Second Guessing

How can your passion just leave out of nowhere?  Or did nowhere actually have a direction with the address to where my passion was headed. I often tried to convince myself that I had chosen the right career path  being a journalism major,  but when writers block came more than often and  my thoughts started to turn into daydream dust i quickly became resistent to writing. Time had  passed and it was too late to take another route when you have already worked hard, and studied long hours to become concrete in this particular field.

I was heading in the right direction,  attending an HBCU that qualified  the best professors who specialize in writing and even worked with major news stations and wrote headlining news articles for the newspaper.

Classes were exciting, we were introduced to new writing styles and became familiar  with writers who have succeeded in their career far beyond words could express, but my excitement inside for writing had vanished briefly.

Please don’t take it that I’m not longing to still pursue my writing, but I wonder will my words touch people and move them in ways verbal expression couldn’t do.

My blank college rule paper stayed just as that blank and so badly I wanted to put words there,  but they  weren’t  flowing through my veins and breaking through the tips of my fingers, and leaking onto my paper for some reason. Had my talent taken a break or what?  It can’t possibly be napping when you had papers to perfect. 

Writing assignments I did attempt were never more than a promise that it would get better, and after so many promises better never came,and I  became defeated. I’m still sulking in that defeat and I no longer want to be here.

I just  want what I think to become what I write and not just stay a thought. It becomes frustrating when you know you are capable of mastering your God given talent. I was literally born to do this,and  I clearly can’t let it go to waste.

Maybe I’m overreacting, but we all have second thoughts every now and then right?  I’m just deciding to tackle mine in this blog post to convey others that our thoughts are real. Eventually those thoughts  become your emotions, and emotion can turn into action.

So with this post; action will be  taken. No more blank pages, yet they will be filled with letters connecting into words, words that can be read and stored in people’s memory and not forgotten on my notebook page.

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